Conspicuous Family

Part of our homestudy included 10 hours of adoption training. We took online classes about China's history, language, and culture. We're taking one about making a lifebook for our child. There are classes about special needs, attachment & bonding, and pretty much any adoption topic you can think of. One of the classes we took was called "Conspicuous Families: Race, Culture, and Adoption." I had to laugh when I read the definition of "Conspicuous Family".  "It means (and I'm quoting) that your family stands out. It means that your family is different." It goes on to say that for conspicuous families, their child's adoption is obvious, public, and visible. They can't deal with issues of race and adoption when they choose to, but when comments, questions, or odd looks are sent in their direction.

I think the reason I find this definition so ironic for me is that for the majority of my life I wanted nothing more than to blend in. I don't know if that was because I was just naturally shy and didn't want to draw attention to myself or because I was blessed with a face full of freckles and curly red hair hanging down to my waist which made it impossible to go anywhere unnoticed! Either way, choosing something that made me stand out – that made me different – was not on my agenda. I guess you could say that insecurity was a major weakness for me.

Well, good thing for me I serve a God whose power is made perfect in MY weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9)! The Bible is FULL of examples of ordinary, weak people being used to fulfill God's purpose. Look at Moses, David, Jonah, Paul ... and the list goes on. What I take from reading these accounts is that my fear and insecurities are NO EXCUSE not to obey God's calling in my life. The first time we ever looked at an adoption application and contemplated the checklist of racial preferences, we were faced with a decision. Check the ONE that would allow us to blend in forever OR listen to the still small voice that said, "Check them all."

From that point forward, I knew it was in God's hands. I was aware that we might get funny looks or questions from strangers, but honestly, I believe that was all by design. The attention our family has gotten over the years has given us so many chances to tell others about how God has blessed our lives through the miracle of adoption. I love the way my family looks ... would not change a thing (even the red hair)! And I can't wait to see the looks when our sweet little Asian princess joins the mix! ;)

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is – his good, pleasing, and perfect will." Romans 12:2