Orphan Sunday

This has been a big weekend for our family! Saturday we celebrated Scott's 39th (for real) birthday and Jackson's sixth birthday. We had a great day at the state park with family and friends and perfect weather. 

Then today was Charlotte's dedication at church ... on what just happens to be Orphan Sunday. It was such a sweet time to stand before our church family, who rallied around us with prayers and support throughout this journey, and commit to raise our daughter as God leads. 

As I sit here and reflect on both these events – on both of these children – my heart is so full. Six years ago God used a tiny, perfect baby boy to completely change my life. The process of adoption is so emotionally exhausting, I remember thinking I could not do it again. But God had other plans. I prayed that He would break my heart for what breaks His, and He completely wrecked me for orphans in this world. 

Do you know what it does to a person's spirit to belong to no one? To be no one's top priority? To have no one's eyes light up when they walk into a room? I'd never personally known anyone who'd been deprived of the love of a family for so long. My first three children have been adored and cherished from the day they were born (and even before, really). But the emptiness and hopelessness I saw in Charlotte's eyes will haunt me until the day I die. God help me if I ever get over it, because then I may forget the children who are still waiting.  

People tell me all the time that I'm a good person for "taking in" my children. That statement astounds me. I feel totally unworthy and privileged beyond measure that God allowed a wretch like me to parent His children. I am no more a good person for saying "yes" than a lottery winner is for "accepting" his winnings. I hit the jackpot! God is father to the fatherless ... and it is an honor to be entrusted to care for them in any way possible. Especially as their mother. 

The good news ... and what fills me with hope ... is that there are NO orphans living in this house. Every child in this house is a daughter or a son. They belong. They are my top priority. And my eyes will always light up when they enter the room. They are creations of the Most High God ... and by HIS grace ... they are mine.